Just like I once said I would never be a runner, I also said I would never run a marathon. However, since I uttered the words “never” a long time ago, I’ve learned that it’s one of the most meaningless words in the English language. It's also the BIGGEST lie we ever tell ourselves. I find myself still shaking my head and letting that never word creep in. Then I promptly tell it to shut up and do things that I probably should have given a second thought.
You would think by now I would stop being surprised when I sign up for something and then have reality hit.....but, NOPE!
I shared a while ago that I signed up for my first triathlon and while I was mostly YAY, after I hit the sign-up button my body immediately rebelled and said "Hey, can we chat? You just volunteered us to do what now?" While it is a mini race, it's still jamming not one, not two, but THREE sports into one. Like I didn't have enough time between everything let's just stack two more workouts to perfect. This may sound whiny, this may sound like I was naive, but at the end of the day my body is just yelling "What have you done!"
It's been a roller coaster of a training cycle. I am honestly not in the shape I want to be going into this and to top it off I can't make it through a swim without getting sick to my stomach. So yeah, that's been fun.
At this point I basically have two options: I can either DNS (Don't Start") or try to make it happen and potentially DNF (Don't Finish). That's not to say that I couldn't make it through the whole race but as it stands now the odds aren't in my favor. No matter how many races you do, how many certifications you have, or how many times you've been in this position; It NEVER gets easier.
As you can tell I'm still working through my feelings/options.
Both options suck. If I DNS I feel like I am not giving myself a chance. If I was injured or really thought I would harm myself by doing the race I would absolutely take the DNS. But with that being said is it worth making myself feel like crap and then end with a DNF? Why push myself to do this and then potentially get sick? I have no good answers, just lots of questions and mixed emotions.
I'm going forward as if I'm going to race but probably won't decide until well into Friday. Even being undertrained I know that my body is capable of handling the mileage both on the bike and run. Now if I could just keep my breakfast down while I swim, that'd be great.
Also, future Shelby, please for the love of all that is holy stop thinking these things are a good idea.